I Think I'm Growing Up.

So the past few months have been a whirlwind and somehow throughout that whirlwind, I've been growing deeper as a person and a follower of Christ than I have in a long time. It's so true that God really meets you in the lowest and deepest places. I think He loves having the opportunity to pull you out of the pit.

I've been thinking and focusing a lot lately on being the best Amy possible. I've been trying to lose weight, read more books, spend daily time with God, and invest myself in people around me. What I've been learning through this process is that everyone I come in contact with (friends, customers, coworkers) has a varying opinion about what the best "me" is. Everyone in your life has expectations of you. It's normal. It's typical. It's exhausting. So, as I'm on this adventure of being the best me I can be, how can I possibly be all these different things to all these different people? At the same time, how can I be the best me for myself? Well... I can't.

So what do I do with this? No matter what I do, how I act, what I say or how I present myself, someone somewhere will be disappointed with the me that I am. Well, lucky me, I have the answer. All I can do is try my best to work towards being more like Christ everyday. Humans are flawed, myself included. He is not. Therefore, if He is satisfied with my heart and my intentions, that's really all that matters.

So instead of striving to be the best me that my friends want to see, or the best me that I want to see, here's to striving to be the best me that God wants to see. I'm sure I won't get it right everyday or even every hour. But I'm gonna try. Cause His is the only standard that I know is good and righteous...

Here and There

So it's been awhile since I've made any blog or facebook updates on life. I figured it was time. Maddy is doing well. We've heard a whole lotta nothing back from the crappy vet, but since then we've found a new one! We've started taking Maddy to the Akron Medina Veterinary Hospital. They are great and we had a much less expensive appointment with them that actually gave us some results! They diagnosed Maddy with a bacterial infection and started her on antibiotics. Yes, its true... there were no ear mites. But the crappy vet still should have noticed all these scabs and lesions all over her body that were multiplying like mad crazy. So since she's been on the antibiotic, there's been major improvement. We got her coat shaved all the way down so we could see her poor irritated skin (which is what lead us to make another vet appointment) and the scabs are starting to go away. Unfortunately, as each of these scabs go away, she's left with hairless patches of pink skin. Poor girl. They're all over her legs, feet, butt and back. It's quite pathetic looking. But, she's in such a better mood and back to her usual Maddy self. So as soon as her skin looks a little less disgusting, we can say that she's all better! They say it could take a month or so.

As for me and my New Year/New Self... I'm on a diet! I have yet to get back to my pre-pregnancy weight, until now! In fact, I'm doing so good that I'm passing it up and losing even more! I've been tracking everything I eat on sparkpeople.com and it has seriously changed my life. It has opened my eyes to the horrible things I used to put in my body and it's shed light on things that are still tasty, yet good for you! The first day I started tracking what I ate, I actually consumed 3000 calories that day! Yuck! (Granted, this included a date night with Andrew and lots of fried food, so I wasn't necessarily that gross every day) Since then, I've got it down to between 1200 - 1500 calories a day. In the past 3.5 weeks, I've lost 8 pounds! It's amazing! And I don't even have to make my lazy butt exercise! And after the initial yearing for fried horribleness, I actually don't even desire to eat that stuff anymore. Well... ok, sometimes I do. But for the most part, I'm enjoying how much better my body feels when I fill it with healthy eats. Loving it! My goal is 10 more pounds by spring so that I can look stunning by the time it's bridesmaid season. =) Plus, whenever our next little bundle of joy is on the way, maybe these healthy habits will keep him/her a little smaller than our 10 pound Nathan. =)

What. A. Week...

And it's still going! So I've told the story of Maddy and the vet a million times already, but it definitely deserves a blog post for those who I don't talk to on a regular basis. Here comes the play by play!!!

Last wednesday/thursday, Maddy had a bloody nose. Not an intense amount, but a decent size drip. Everytime she would go outside, it'd start up again, so I attributed it to the cold weather drying her out. Saturday morning, she started losing her appetite. By saturday afternoon, she stopped eating all together and by saturday night, she had diarrhea. This continued through all of sunday. By the end of the day sunday, I noticed her paws were bloody and she was chewing on them constantly and they were starting to bleed. She wasn't herself. Hardly getting up or moving at all. In fact, her paws were so irritated that she hobbled as she walked. Poor girl. =(

Monday morning I decided she needed to go to the vet. She still wasn't eating and I was worried about dehydration. She just kept looking more and more miserable. So I called the vet and they told me they didn't have any appointments availalble, so take her to the ER. (Strike one) I was ticked because taking her to the ER meant $100 office visit rather than a $30 office visit.

Into the ER we go with Katie in tow cause she was here visiting. So sorry it put a damper on our fun, but boy was it great to have my best friend by my side while I took "man's best friend" to the doctor. So I tell the ER doctor all her symptoms. They insist that the itching and biting at her paws is because she's developed a food allergy. My first problem with this is that they made this assumption without even doing any kind of exam on her yet. They decided that this was the problem and didn't work to investigate it further. In fact, through our whole experience, they never once asked me what I feed Maddy or suggested something new to try.

At this point I also informed them that she's been having itching in her ears for at least a month now and that it looks exactly the same as when our cat had ear mites. The ER doctor responds (without even lifting up the flap of her ears to check) that this is because of the food allergy and that ear mites aren't as common in dogs as cats. Ok, I say... doctor's know best, right?

So I leave her there and wait for a call to hear how the blood work and x-rays went. The purpose of these tests were to see why she wasn't eating and why she was having diarrhea. Well, after four hours, I decide to call and check in on her myself. I call the ER and they inform me to call my vet that works at the Bath Veterinary Clinic. They say that she's the one overseeing the case and that they're forwarding all information to her. So I call her. And she knows hardly anything. She hasn't seen Maddy at all. She's just reading the info they gave her via fax. Helpful, eh? She tells me that the tests all came back clear and that they don't know what's wrong with her, but they'll keep her there and keep her hydrated till morning.

So I get a call tuesday morning. Again, from the vet that hasn't seen Maddy at all. She tells me that Maddy's doing better! "Great," I think! Then she goes on to say that Maddy still isn't eating. She isn't pooping at all. And the inflamation on her feet is getting worse. But they think I should take her home. Wait a minute... where's the great? From what I'm hearing, you're telling me she's getting worse.

I decide to just let it go and get off the phone. I decided I'll just go to the ER to pick Maddy up and insist on talking to a doctor on site that is actually interacting with Maddy. So I go and request to see a doctor and they insist that the only doctor I can talk to is the one I've already been conversing with on the phone. So they put me on the phone with her again! I was fuming. Seriously, intensely mad. So I got straight up...

I told her that I spent nearly $700 on all these tests because I was worried about my dog and now they're sending me home with a dog that I'm even more worried about because she hadn't eaten in 3 days and her itching was getting worse! The doctor talked herself in circles and then offered for me to spend another $1000 on an internal medicine specialist. Right. Fat chance. So I took all her records and test results with me and headed home with a sick dog.

The gave me medicine for her that they didn't tell me how to administer. They told me to put her back on her regular diet. (Remind you, they don't know what this regular diet is, and they suggest that she has a food allergy... but I should keep it the same????) They didn't tell me to follow up or anything. Just "take her home."

By tuesday afternoon, Maddy decided to eat a little bit. Thank God! She still looked miserable though. By tuesday evening, I noticed she now had a scabby bloody spot on the tip of her ear. Wierd. She couldn't have chewed the tip of her ear, so these scabs have to be popping up for a different reason. Andrew hops on google and investigates scabby ears in canines. What causes this? EAR MITES!!!! For real? I told the doctor that's what we thought she had, but they didn't even bother to look. Ok, unedjucated readers... you make the call... Here is a picture of a dog's ear with ear mites...


Here's a picture of Maddy's ear last night... (Granted, it looked a lot dirtier in person, but you get the idea. My camera isn't that great.)


Doesn't take a genius to see that these are the same. And it turns out that if ear mites go untreated, they can start laying eggs under the skin that cause scabby sores and extreme itching. Weird. Sounds like Maddy. =P

So last night, I made a trip to petsmart. Andrew and I proceeded to give Maddy a bath in an insecticide and treated her ears with ear mite cleaner. Already this morning, the itching has gone down a bit and her mood is right back to the hyper Maddy we know and love. She's started eating again and she's getting much better all around.

Thank you Dr. Thorp, Bath Veterinary Clinic, and Metropolitan Veterinary Hospital for charging us $700 for blood work and x-rays instead of just lifting up my dog's ear to check on the mites I told you I thought were there. Coulda saved us a lot of trouble, money and heartache. Google did a better job on making my dog healthier and more comfortable than you did.

P.S. As for the bloody nose... mites can travel down to the nose and cause nosebleeds. Hmm... coincidence?

From Surviving to Thriving...

2010 was one of the roughest, yet most blessed years of my life. It's amazing how some of the greatest and most rewarding things can also be so stressful. From having a beautiful baby boy amidst a 6 month long kitchen remodel, to spending 5 days in the hospital when he had RSV... I'd say this year has been a whirlwind. Most of the time I was just surviving from one day to the next. From one adventure to another.

But, I wouldn't trade a minute of my time with these two men for anything.


And who can argue with having a kitchen like this?


And despite all the sickness Nathan experienced the month of December. It doesn't stop his smiles.


All I can say is that I'm ready to go from surviving, to thriving. And with that, most importantly, is taking full advantage of the wonderful friends and family I have surrounding me. This year, my resolution is to be more intentional in my relationships. To deepen my relationships rather than just maintain them.

Most of all, I just want to be a better me. =)

Praying for a healthier year...

December has truly been the hardest month of my life. Poor little Nathan just can't catch a break. From our hospital stay the first week of the month, to his bout with the flu this past week of the month, I'm learning that being a mom can be painful. It is so hard to watch my little guy be so sad and be so sick and not be able to do anything about it. Granted, this flu bug he caught isn't the end of the world, but it's just bringing all the memories of our hospital stay back to the surface of my heart. I just want the little guy to be healthy. I feel like every bug that comes around seems to find its way into my little boy. =(

I can say that I'm thankful for the blessings that have made this month bearable...

1) Friends and family constantly offering anything they could to help us during our lowest of times.

2) Nathan's first Christmas was AMAZING! He had so much fun playing with the paper and pushing boxes around. His favorite gifts of course were all under $5. Racquet balls, maracas, and a plush football.

3) The flexibility of a part time schedule and managers that are more than understanding of the extenuating circumstances that have caused me to be so MIA this month.

4) The sermon series at church. Pastor Jeff has been preaching about God being "With Us" and what that really means. Boy has it helped to just close my eyes sometime and visualize God literally being at my side and holding me and little Nathan through these tough moments.

All I want for the new year is a fresh start with a healthy Nathan. The first 11 months of 2010 weren't so bad. Let's let go of December and go back to that...

Embarking on an Adventure!

So I've decided that with my new schedule, I need to be sure to devote some of my free time to God. I've never been good at setting aside intentional time to read and study the Bible, so I figured it's time to start. I would call it a New Year's resolution, but those never work out... so I'll call it a New Amy resolution. One more way to intentionally become the better me I'm striving to be. =)

This devotional book is a study of 52 different women from the Bible. The idea is to read about one woman a week. There are five daily readings or exercises each week... allowing you two days of wiggle room to keep on track. It says it's intention is to "help you approach the story of salvation with fresh eyes." It teaches you about the woman's story and the background of her life and times.

I'm quite excited about it. If anyone out there wants to join me and hold each other accountable to keeping on track, let me know! I know it sounds like quite a commitment, but I think it could be really rewarding. =)

LOVING IT!!!

Life is so darn good right now. I honestly can say that I've never been happier. I've always wanted to be a stay at home mom and this working part time thing is the perfect transitional step. Nathan and I have been having a blast together on all my days off and we're starting to get into routines and naps that I can generally plan on.

Nathan's been learning lots of new things lately. One of them is learning to crawl...


Another is learning to pull himself up! He loves staring out the window and looking to see what's going on outside. =)


I've been learning my fair share of new things too! Well, I shouldn't say learning. More like tweaking. Our house has never been cleaner and I've started trying new recipes! Last night, I made Andrew a spicy southwestern mac n cheese! Since mac n cheese is his favorite meal, you don't have to guess that he was quite impressed. =)

I've spent so many years wishing for things and time that I didn't have. Now there's nothing to wish for! I get to spend most of my days home with Nathan, learning to be a good mommy and a better wife. And three days a week, I get to take a little break and get my grown-up time at work. It's perfect. It's really really perfect. I feel so blessed to have this opportunity. ESPECIALLY during the Christmas season!